Ever since the final episode of Breaking Bad aired, I’ve often found myself reflecting back upon the story arc of the show. As fans, we enjoyed a rather strange love/hate relationship with the enigmatic Walter White, and his alter-ego Heisenberg. This was in no small part due to the underlying moral ambiguity, which could leave viewers feeling more than a little squeamish at times. Yet perhaps the most captivating aspect of every episode was how by a subtle combination of pivotal transgressions, we watched the transmutation of an otherwise good man… gone bad.
From the very beginning, we sensed Walt’s deeply conflicted nature, changing from an otherwise peaceful guy, to a life reeling under a constant threat of violence. In the first episode, after a group of teens mock Junior, Walter sneaks up upon and viciously attacks the largest punk from behind, defending his son, while making him a more sympathetic character too. As the episodes progressed, laid out before the audience was this strangely twisted transition from a normally kind, if perhaps mild mannered teacher, husband and father, becoming instead someone relentlessly calculating in his disregard for human life, in essence a true cold-blooded killer. While a ruthless disposition like this certainly serves any up-and-coming drug king pin with distinction, with each such choice he made, Walt stepped farther away from those he really loves, and deeper down the rabbit hole of stark brutality. However, violence was only a part of Walt’s psychological whole, a symptom of larger struggles already raging within him.
Then there’s Walter’s almost continuous lying and guiltless manipulation of others. Seemingly a once honest and upstanding citizen, Walt transforms himself step by step into the man no one can trust, and that no one even dare believe. His earlier purely spontaneous, almost laughable diversions later became a spider’s web of finely crafted manipulative psychodramas, influencing everyone by sheer pull of his own perverted version of reality. Then once his evil Heisenberg personality began talking, watch out! The utter fragility hiding behind this false Heisenberg Truth stood out with unflinching clarity in nearly every episode. In many ways, it was this increasingly shaky foundation, built on layers upon layers of lies, which helped create tension and expectation among regular viewers. We anxiously waited for weeks and months on end, constantly wondering… How long until someone figures this out, before Walt’s lies are exposed? With his powerful empire built upon the sand of deceit and lies, such inner misconceptions of truth so corrupted Walt’s logic and intelligence, that he failed to comprehend the inevitability of his own foreshadowed collapse and utter ruin.
Walt’s repeated guiding principle was “Respect the Chemistry” and offered numerous examples of the continuing quandary between using his ‘Science Knowledge’ for either good or evil. Clearly, Walt’s unique understanding of chemistry, as well as general science skills, saved their sorry asses more than once. Yet often I wondered how the story might have played differently had Walter White had turned down an unexpectedly positive path. Would the show have been nearly as popular if instead of cooking his mythical blue meth, Walt used his extraordinary skills instead to concoct some fantastic homeopathy treatment that cured cancer? What if Walter made his fortune by selling this alternative cancer remedy very publicly, thereby sticking it to all those ruthless pharmaceutical companies? Seems by failing to use his tremendous intellectual gifts for the greater good, Walter tragically demonstrates how too much knowledge, and too little wisdom, cause folks to destroy themselves in the end.
Yet beyond the constant violence, the lying and manipulation, more than using his great intellect to create a truly destructive chemical product, Walter White just wanted to be important in some way, to feel in control of his fate once again. Maybe dying of cancer just put a sharper edge on things, which is why in the end Walt admitted “I did it for me,” telling Skyler “I liked it. I was good at it. I was alive.” So cooking crystal blue meth was never really about the money then, it was simply the best way he saw available to fully express the vitality of his mental abilities. Deep down Walter White decided the intoxicating power of establishing his own massive drug empire satisfied the desire for his life to have some greater meaning. Even if the ultimate cost of succeeding became tremendously high… Walt always believed the end would justify the means.
Ignored by his students, taken for granted by family, his earlier intellectual property sold cheap, then finding himself standing at death’s door, Walter White saw his own life as an empty shell, desperately insignificant. That this one struggling, middle-class chemistry teacher would choose to pay the ultimate price of self-actualization, cooking his death meth for millions in profits, somehow does not seem too surprising to television viewers. That his ever present hubris predictably brought the meth empire of Walter White crashing down around him was inevitable. Yet perhaps more troubling is the effect of Walt’s spreading corruption upon those around him. Jesse saw himself become “One of the Bad Guys.” Skyler helped build his web of lies, aided in tax fraud, then “Fucked Ted” just to get back at Walt. Marie was a habitual kleptomaniac, and Hank would break just about any law to bring Walter down. Each a fascinating character, allowing us to safely experience this vast array of all too familiar human failings at a psychologically safe distance.
Now, with the series concluded, we might still ask ourselves: How far over the line into ‘badness’ would I be willing to step if only to achieve some greater of power over my fate, or direct my larger destiny? Might I on occasion lie to those who trust me, thinking I’ll get away with it? Might I use knowledge of a situation to help me take advantage of the next poor sap who comes along? Can I always restrain myself from even the implied threat of violence when someone really pisses me off? How much am I going to be willing to bend or break my own higher moral conscience, for just a fleeting sense of self-importance, or a bit more control over my life? These lingering questions still challenge me, and hopefully a few others who watched Breaking Bad to the bitter, but logical end.
The everlasting human struggle, as exemplified brilliantly in fictional character of Walter White, continues on within us, the loyal viewers. We might stop to reflect upon how the prideful arrogance, as personified by the truly dangerous Heisenberg, quite predictably destroyed everything Walter White once held dear. After the finale, Vince Gilligan alluded to how Walt’s death in the meth lab was similar to the Gollum in ‘Lord of the Rings’ in being reunited with “His Precious.” Walter sacrificed the best parts of his humanity for a chance to briefly hold this ‘brass ring’ of inflated egotism, savoring the transitory experience of personal power and glory. The tragically proverbial ‘Pride goes before the fall’ lesson here is: It matters not how vast the material rewards appear, or to gain a few days more at another’s expense, it’s simply not worth burdening one’s immortal soul to carry such broken karma for all eternity. It’s just not….
